ASCII-Storys #13「ZOMBIE BUGS & TABLES」

A post-apocalyptic flipocalypse of undead code.

Act I – Day 0: The Infection

> push origin master

⚠️  WARNING: Merge conflict ignored.
⚠️  WARNING: "Bug_z1.js" unexpectedly revived.

🧟‍♂️ BUG: *"Me want... brains().map()..."*

Act II – The Office Falls

    Dev: (╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻   ← panics
    PM: (ノಥ益ಥ)ノ彡┻━┻  ← flips in Excel
    AI: (⌐■_■)  "Containment failed."

    QA-Cat:  
      /\_/\  
     ( ⚆ _ ⚆ )  "They've entered production..."
      >#<

    🧟 Zombie Bugs:
    - Crawling out of legacy code
    - Hiding in minified files
    - Whispering `"eval"` in the dark

Act III – Tables Strike Back

┳━┳  
Chairs flee.  
┻━┻ Tables FLIP THEMSELVES  
        ┬──┬ ノ( º _ ºノ)

    Flip-Fortress built from desks and whiteboards.

🧠  Bug King appears:
function eatBrains(dev) {
    return dev.motivation -= 1;
}

Final Act – The Last Patch

  Dev: (╯°□°）╯︵ ⌨️  
  Cat: (=ↀωↀ=) "Deploy garlic.js"
  AI:  (⌐■_■) "Running final patch… hope.exe"

🕹️ Ctrl+Z! Ctrl+Z! Ctrl+Z!

🌞 Dawn rises…  
┬──┬   ← one last table still stands.

Moral:

Bugs die…
But Zombie Bugs respawn in cached memory.